Watching a loved one battle addiction is challenging, and seeing them relapse can be heartbreaking. Many people in recovery experience setbacks, a relapse in addiction, defined as a return to substance use among recovering patients, is often part of the healing process. It’s important to remember that relapse does not mean failure—addiction is a chronic condition that requires ongoing effort and support.
If someone you love has relapsed, knowing how to respond can make a significant difference in their recovery journey. Reacting with anger or disappointment may push them further away, while understanding, support, and professional guidance can help them get back on track.
In this guide, we’ll discuss the warning signs of relapse, how to offer help in a productive way, and what treatment options are available to support long-term recovery.
Understanding Relapse in Addiction
Relapse occurs when someone who has achieved sobriety returns to using drugs or alcohol. It’s important to understand that addiction is a chronic disease, much like diabetes or high blood pressure, meaning that setbacks are possible. Relapse rates for individuals with substance use disorders range from 40-60%, highlighting the commonality of relapse and the importance of learning from each relapse to aid in future recovery efforts.
The Stages of Relapse
Relapse is not a sudden event—it happens in stages:
- Emotional Relapse: The individual may not be thinking about using substances, but they begin to exhibit signs of emotional distress, such as anxiety, mood swings, isolation, or poor self-care.
- Mental Relapse: They start having cravings, romanticizing past substance use, or struggling with the idea of staying sober. They may also begin lying or making excuses.
- Physical Relapse: This is the stage where the individual returns to drug or alcohol use.
Recognizing relapse as a gradual process can help loved ones intervene before it escalates. Understanding these stages can help reduce relapse risk.
Signs of Relapse: How to Recognize Warnings
Recognizing relapse warning signs early can help you take action before the situation worsens. While every person is different, some common warning signals include:
Emotional Signs:
- Increased stress, anxiety, or irritability
- Mood swings or frequent defensiveness
- Lack of motivation or interest in recovery activities
- Isolation from family, friends, or support groups
These emotional signs are particularly common during early recovery.
Mental Signs:
- Thinking about using substances again
- Glorifying past substance use
- Feeling like they can have “just one drink” or “just one hit”
- Arguing that they no longer need treatment or meetings
Untreated mental health conditions can exacerbate these mental signs.
Behavioral Signs:
- Skipping therapy or support group meetings
- Reconnecting with old using friends
- Lying, being secretive, or withdrawing from loved ones
- Financial issues, missing work, or engaging in risky behavior
- Returning to drug use
How to Help Someone Who Relapsed: Steps for Family & Friends
When a loved one relapses, you may feel hurt, frustrated, or even betrayed. However, how you respond can influence whether they seek help or sink deeper into substance use. Encouraging them to enter a treatment program is crucial, as professional help can provide the necessary support and care to adjust their recovery plan and address specific needs. Here’s what you can do to support them:
Stay Calm and Supportive
Your first instinct might be to react with disappointment or anger, but it’s crucial to approach the situation with understanding. Addiction is a disease, and relapse is often a symptom of the condition rather than a personal failure.
Encourage Open Communication
Let your loved one know they are not alone and that they can talk to you without fear of judgment. Ask open-ended questions like:
- “How have you been feeling lately?”
- “What do you think led to this relapse?”
- “How can I support you in getting back on track?”
Avoid blaming or shaming, as this can make them feel even more isolated.
Avoid Enabling Behavior
Offering support does not mean excusing or justifying their relapse. Be mindful of actions that could enable their addiction, such as:
- Providing financial assistance that could be used to buy substances
- Covering up for their mistakes (e.g., calling in sick for them at work)
- Ignoring destructive behaviors in hopes that they will stop on their own
Setting clear boundaries can help your loved one recognize the need for treatment.
Encourage Them to Seek Help
If your loved one has relapsed, they may need to return to treatment. Encourage them to speak with a therapist, attend a support group, or consider entering one of the many treatment programs available to fit their individual recovery process.
Take Care of Yourself
Supporting someone through addiction recovery can be emotionally draining. Don’t neglect your own well-being—seek therapy, join a support group for families of addicts, and set healthy boundaries.
Treatment Options After a Relapse
Relapse does not mean that treatment has failed—it is a part of the continuous journey of managing addiction and provides crucial insights into an individual’s recovery process. There are many options available to help your loved one get back on track.
Returning to Rehab
Depending on the severity of the relapse, your loved one may need to return to an inpatient or outpatient rehab program. Many facilities offer individualized treatment plans that address the root causes of addiction. Chronic substance use can create lasting changes in the brain, necessitating a return to rehab.
Therapy and Counseling
Evidence-based therapies such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) can help individuals process trauma, identify triggers, and develop coping strategies. Therapy can also help address underlying mental health issues that contribute to relapse.
Support Groups and Programs
Twelve-step programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA), or other support groups for addiction can provide community support and accountability, which can be crucial in recovery.
Medication-Assisted Treatment (MAT) for Substance Use Disorders
For individuals struggling with opioid or alcohol addiction, medication-assisted treatment (such as Suboxone or Vivitrol) may be an option to prevent cravings and withdrawal symptoms.
Encouraging your loved one to explore these options can help them re-establish their sobriety. Years of chronic substance use can create lasting changes in brain structure and function, making medication-assisted treatment necessary.
Preventing Future Relapses: Long-Term Strategies
While relapse can be a learning experience, identifying and managing risk factors should be a priority to prevent future relapses. Here are some key strategies:
Identify Triggers and Develop Coping Skills
Common relapse triggers include stress, social pressure, and emotional distress. Encourage your loved one to develop healthy coping mechanisms, such as:
- Exercise and physical activity
- Meditation and mindfulness techniques
- Journaling and creative outlets
Strengthen Their Support System
Having a reliable support network is essential for long-term sobriety. Encourage them to stay connected with supportive friends, family, and mentors.
Develop a Relapse Prevention Plan
A relapse prevention plan helps individuals recognize warning signs early and create a strategy to stay on track. This may include:
- A list of personal triggers
- A step-by-step action plan for when cravings arise
- Emergency contacts for support
Addressing substance abuse is crucial in developing an effective relapse prevention plan.
Continue Treatment and Therapy
Sobriety is a lifelong commitment. Ongoing therapy, check-ins, and participation in recovery programs help maintain long-term recovery.
Hope After Relapse
Relapse can feel discouraging, but it does not mean the end of the recovery journey. By responding with compassion, setting healthy boundaries, and encouraging professional treatment, you can help your loved one find their way back to sobriety.
If your loved one is struggling after a relapse, Recovery at the Crossroads is here to help. Our team of professionals offers evidence-based treatment options to support long-term recovery. Contact us today to learn more about our programs and how we can assist you and your loved one in their journey to lasting sobriety.
